Kayo (June 22)

PART 2 OF MY INTERNSHIP EPIC! WOW!

Kayo had recently signed with David. He was a couple years younger than me and made his music in his dorm room at school. He seemed relatively intelligent compared to what I expected but I noticed some very odd things about him. For one, he was selling massive amounts of pot and claiming to David that he was broke. He would tell David his travel costs were excessive and David would then give him money for gas and food etc. I couldn't believe I was the only one, as an intern, who could see what was really going on here but I let it go.

David decided that me and Kayo needed to sit down and discuss our script ideas. Kayo was less than thrilled. It seems everyone who found themselves around David ended up working on his pet projects which they didn't much like.

Sitting in a cafe with Kayo, David walks in very excited. Two young black guys are with him. He tells us that these two guys were talking and he overheard them calling each other the N word. David of course, actually used the word. He said that Kayo and I should pick their brains to figure out why it was ok for them to use the N word on each other, yet it was racist otherwise. This would be a great idea for our FIRST EPISODE! Then he left us. The four of us stared uncomfortably at each other for about 30 seconds. The guys said they were going to go get a drink and left. Kayo and I actually mapped out a few story ideas. If we had been writing a purely fictional show loosely based on real people, we might actually have been able to film some relatively entertaining things. This would never happen.

A couple weeks later, Kayo and I had to shoot a video with a child that lived in David's building. The kid had been picked on at school and David decided that he would "produce a video for a real rap star" to make the kids at school think he was cool. Kayo was worried about ruining his credibility if the final product made it to YouTube. I just thought the whole thing was ridiculous. What if a kid googled Kayo and found out he was nobody? What if the video just came out bad? Since when do nine year olds produce videos? WHAT THE HELL IS GOIN ON!?

Naturally, David said, as he usually did, that this would be perfect for the, yes, FIRST EPISODE. The one about Danilo. The one entitled "I'm Not Black". It was supposed to deal with how a dark skinned person dealt with "black" stereotypes when he was not in fact black. David thought this was groundbreaking tagging it the first ever "serial com-docu-drama." he even made a webpage with my name on it along with "Auggie Doggie" and "Biddy Q" (the doorman).

Well I couldn't wrap my head around everything happening in the first episode. I tried to explain continuity in television to David. He told me that my professors in college didn't know anything and that I should be thinking about TV shows like Gilligan's Island and Seinfeld. Gilligan's Island was on 40 years ago! How can you ask me to model something off of that?? Even so you can't wedge 12 different events into one episode anyway! Oh clearly my professors were the morons.

It all became clear when he also FINALLY explained to me what a pilot was, because I didn't know. See, this pilot I was writing was supposed to be a 45 minute montage of charitable events that David, Danilo, Kayo and a slew of other random people were involved in. We would show it to the execs at ABC and get picked up. EVEN COOLER, each episode would be capped with a NEW music video from Kayo, produced by Danilo! Oh, and I should have something ready to go in about a month before my internship ended...

TO BE CONTINUED!